Narcissistic Personality Disorder Overview

It’s important to discern the difference between someone portraying narcissistic traits, and someone with true narcissistic personality disorder.

Narcissistic personality disorder is not a ‘new’ phenomenon and was included in the very first version of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) over 40 years ago.

The DSM remains one of the most educationally sound and proficient categorisation methods of mental disorders in Australia. According to the DSM-5 definition, there are 9 signs someone may have narcissistic personality disorder or narcissistic personality type, to what extreme is dependent on where they lie on the spectrum.

An extravagant sense of self-importance

A classic sign of narcissists is the inflated image they hold of themselves. Narcissists have been described using words like vain, selfish, greedy, and egotistical. Not only do people suffering from narcissistic personality sit upon a high horse of self-righteousness - but they also view others as ‘lesser than’.

Unattainable dreams of unlimited success, power, beauty, or love

Since reality rarely ever meets their grandiose view of themselves and what they believe their lives SHOULD be like, narcissists often get lost in fantasies involving ideal scenarios. This fantasy world is held up by distortion and self-deception and involves dreams that make them feel special and powerful.

A sense they are unique and can only be understood by others of equal higher importance

The belief that they are ‘one-of-a-kind’ corresponds directly with their magnified ego. A narcissist often feels as though they are so special that nobody ‘ordinary’ or ‘average’ can understand them. In addition, they feel as though only others of equal high status or importance are worth their time.

An inner need for lavish praise and approval

If you find yourself in a relationship, or close to a narcissist, then you understand how positive words of affirmation seem to go in one ear and out the other. Narcissists crave and require outside validation to feel good about themselves, no matter how much you pour into them, it’s never enough.

An overbearing sense of entitlement

Feeling entitled is another aspect of narcissistic personality disorder that can be incredibly frustrating for those around them. In nearly every circumstance, the belief narcissists hold in which they deserve only the very best in life is unearned and baseless. They feel entitled to whatever they want without having to work for it.

Constant behaviour that takes advantage of others

Self-exploiting behaviour is one of the most damaging and hurtful manipulation tactics used by narcissists to gain what they want. Oftentimes, narcissists may choose partners or friends that seem ‘weak’ in their eyes or easy to manipulate in order to cultivate a subservient type of relationship. Methods of exploitation are used against others no matter the cost.

Absence of empathy or consideration of others

Low empathy, or the inability to put themselves in another's shoes, can be thought of as the reason for a narcissist's harsh and careless behaviour. Some experts feel as though narcissistic personality disorder is a ‘lack of empathy problem’. For the rest of the population, empathy is the open door to experiencing the distress of another person. Being able to acknowledge someone else’s pain becomes the root of compassion. However, this is simply not the case for a narcissist.

Preoccupation with envy

When it comes to narcissism, envy can be broken into two categories: people that are sources of jealousy, and an imagined jealousy from others. Envy rarely overtakes the mind of someone comfortable in their own skin. Since a narcissist is deep down insecure with who they are, feelings of hostility and bitterness are ever present, reminding a narcissist of their shortcomings.

Arrogant or self-absorbed behaviour

Arrogant behaviour can manifest in many ways. For a narcissist this may come across as constant exaggerations of their accomplishments or abilities, an unearned sense of overconfidence, or an excessive need to control every aspect of a situation. Since narcissists view so highly of themselves, they believe their way is the best way, without any consideration for outside opinions.

The major difference between someone who may be seen as ‘cocky’ and someone who is an arrogant narcissist, is the intent. Narcissists aim to destroy another person’s confidence, in order to make them feel poorly about themselves.