There is bravery & strength in letting go
Untangling oneself from what no longer serves us
As a general specie that adheres religiously to the concept of forever, we humans can hardly question why we become so tangled in the notion that everything we are, everything we have, and everything we attain is here to stay. It's quite paradoxical if you think about how the temporariness of things and their permanence are spoken of in equal volume.
Of course, love and affection are always the first attachments that come to mind when the concept of letting go is uttered, but really anything we unhealthily attach ourselves to, is something that’s eventually going to demand liberty from us. Or is it the other way around? Regardless, what we know with credence is that there are many things and many layers we are in need of shedding.
What are you looking to let go of?
Think of your past that whispers unkind words to you; think of your anger that’s gone unchecked and rogue for too long; think of your fears that are possibly keeping you from the beauty of the world — and think of that love that lays so heavy on your heart. Aren’t these all things you would eventually want to wash your hands of? The thoughts of investing your emotional currency in letting go tire you, but the possibility of managing this feat inspires you. So, is letting go possible?
Why is letting go so hard?
Letting go is uncharacteristically tough because it signifies separating ourselves from things and aspects that we've deemed part of our identity. There is perhaps nothing more excruciating than losing parts of the identity that we've worked so hard to carve. There is a deep emotional and psychological investment associated with things that add to our make, even if they’re essentially negative to our wellbeing.
How does letting go help?
Letting go is very much like a deep exhale after holding your breath for too long. Once you're on the other bank of the travail, you’ll begin to notice all the little improvements that your mind is manifesting.
You’ll be more compassionate towards yourself: Self-compassion is the biggest victory that you’ll get out of letting go. Once you’ve granted yourself the care that you needed to pass through the agony of letting go, kindness for yourself will become a way of being.
You’ll have fewer mental plunges: Remember those unexplained feelings of sadness and worthlessness that visited a little too often when you held on to that something a little too tight? They’ll be a lot less frequent once you loosen your grip.
Your bodily health will progress: You'll be surprised to learn that letting go of detrimental emotional ties has been linked to better heart health, a stronger immune system, and significantly lower blood pressure. Your body speaks to you more often than you know; think about what it's trying to tell you now.
The impending question: how to let go?
Regardless of what you are clinging to, letting go is unequivocally hard for everyone. It hurts, doesn’t pass quickly or easily and consumes you. But… you will get through it.
Use time and distance to your favour: Whatever you're contemplating over letting go, make sure you offer yourself plenty of time to heal and a good amount of distance not to be tempted. Remove yourself from situations that have proven themselves triggers in the past.
Bask in mindfulness: Being aware and accepting of your circumstances and the trajectory of life as it is, will make everything more real and somewhat easier to swallow. While your mind may swerve you towards opting for denial as a less painful route, fight it by reminding yourself that your mindfulness will guide you out of the anguish sooner than any other way.
Be gentler to yourself: Reutilising the capacity of self-compassion that you unlocked through your bravery, give yourself a little extra nurturance as you navigate life without what you perceived as an essentiality for so long. Be just as patient and understanding to yourself as you would be to a friend, after all you are your own best friend.
